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  • Aviator's

    Origin of the term "Aviator"

    (Aviators come from a secret society formed around a thousand years ago. They are warriors, and below is the proof.)

    A little known fact is the origin of the word "aviator". In the immortal words of Johnny Carson: "I did not know that." Phu Khen (pronounced Foo Ken ), 1169-??? is considered by some to be the most under-recognized military officer in history. Many have never heard of his contributions to modern military warfare. The mission of this secret society is to bring honor to the name of Phu Khen.

    A Khen was a subordinate to a Khan in the military structure of the Mongol hordes. Khan is Turkish for leader. Most know of the great Genghis Khan, but little has been written of his chain of command.

    Khen is also of Turkish origin, although there is not a word in English that adequately conveys the meaning. Roughly translated, it means " One who will do the impossible while appearing unprepared and complaining constantly." Phu Khen was one of ten Khens that headed the divisions, or groups of hordes as they were known, of the Mongal Army serving under Genghis Khan. His abilities came to light during the Mongols' raids on the Turkistan city of Bohicaroo . Bohicans were fierce warriors and the city was well fortified. The entire city was protected by huge walls and the hordes were at a standoff with the Bohicans. Bohicaroo was well stocked and it would have been difficult to wait them out. Genghis Khan assembled his Khens and ordered each of them to develop a plan for penetrating the defenses of Bohicaroo.

    Operation Achieve Victory, "AV", was born. All 10 divisions of Khens submitted their plan. After reviewing AV plans 1 through 7 and finding them unworkable or ridiculous, Genghis Khan was understandably upset.

    It was with much perspiration that Phu Khen submitted his idea, which came to be known as AV 8. Upon seeing AV 8, Genghis was convinced this was the perfect plan and gave immediate approval. The plan was beautifully simple. Phu Khen would arm his hordes to the teeth, load them into catapults and hurl them over the wall. The losses were expected to be high, but hey, hordes were cheap. Those that survived the flight would engage the enemy in combat. Those that did not? Well, surely their flailing bodies would cause some damage. The plan worked and the Bohicans were defeated. From that day on, whenever the Mongol Army encountered an insurmountable enemy, Genghis Khan would give the order "Send some of the Phu Khen AV 8ers."

    This is believed, though not by anyone outside our secret society, to be the true origin of the word Aviator.
    Phu Khen's AV8ers were understandably an unruly mob, not likely to be sociably acceptable. Many were heavy drinkers and insomniacs. However, when nothing else would do, you could always count on an AV8er. A Phu Khen Aviator. Denied, perhaps rightfully so, his place in history, Phu Khen has been, nonetheless, immortalized in prose.

    You hear mystical references, often hushed whispers, of "those Phu Khen Aviators." Do not let these things bother you. As with any secret society, we go largely misunderstood, prohibited by our apathy from explaining ourselves.

    You are expected to always live down to the reputation of the Phu Khen Aviator, a reputation cultivated for centuries, undaunted by scorn or ridicule, unhindered by progress. So drink up, be crude, sleep late, urinate in public and get the job done.

    When others are offended, you can revel in the knowledge that YOU are a PHU KHEN AVIATOR.
    "96% of all Internet Quotes are suspect and the remaining 4% are fiction."
    ~~Abraham Lincoln~~

  • #2
    FUNNY.. very nice.. I was believing it until you put 'em
    If you cant stand behind the troops in Iraq.. Feel free to stand in front of them.


    • #3
      very nicely tell me the story of the big watch and always talking with your hands....excellent story


      • #4
        This is closely related to the Legend of the origins of the title "Navigator", which got it's beginnings in the swamps of Florida. Apparently a Navaho Indian guide was visiting the Seminoles, when he apparently got somewhat "geographically disoriented" (what pilots refer to when they're actually "lost") in the swamps. Knowing that the Navaho was an excellent tracker, the Seminoles didn't bother looking for him. Days, then weeks, then months and then years pass by . . the Navaho doesn't show up. The Seminoles figured he'd had enough of the swamplife and headed back to the desert.

        Then, up one day out of the swamp pops the Navaho and 6 ugly (I mean REALLY ugly) kids show up. Apparently, the Navaho, being "geographicaly disoriented" in unfamiliar territory decided to sit down and wait for rescue. When none was forthcoming, he decided to settle in for a long hot summer (it being Florida 'n all). He ran into this somewhat homely lookin' gal there in the swamps and hunkered down for the winter with her. Things being things, they had six little kids over the next few years.

        One day, the Navaho decided to try and find his friends the Seminoles. After poking around a bit, he'd come upon a long lost trail that led back to the main encampment of the Seminoles. Upon arriving, the Seminoles were taken aback somewhat by the kids severe appearance, but shrugged it off to bad genes. Later in the day, the Seminoles see a large alligator slithering up into camp towards the Navaho's children. Believing the children are in mortal danger, the Seminoles begin slinging arrows and spears at the reptile. Hearing the commotion outside, the Navaho rushes outside to find the Seminoles attacking the 'gator.

        "STOP!!!" he screams. "You're going to hurt my wife, the mother of my children." Apparently the Navaho wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed (which is probably why the Navaho tribe had let him go in the first place), and had mated with an alligator producing incredibly ugly offspring that are today known as "Navigators".

        Navigators were also known as WSO's, EWO's and CSO's. They are quickly dying out, mostly due to their limited intelligence and incredibly horrible looks, and are being replaced by GPS and other intelligent forms of automation.

        Now you know the origin of the title "Navigator", and here's a picture of one of the first Navigators, along with one his first dates outside of the swamp.
        Click image for larger version

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        • #5
          Sounds a lot like my grandfather, who was something of a chemist. Decided to develop a tasty soft drink, and began experimenting. Naming each after his grandchildren, he started with One Up. He wasn't really a very good chemist, it seems, and he finally had to give it all up after having tried a his last formula, which he had named Six Up.

          Should have stuck with it a little longer, I guess . . .


          • #6
            Originally posted by Akres View Post
            "those Phu Khen Aviators."
            I was taught to say that in A&P school...and Chinggis Khan was smart enough not to believe everything a pilot told him


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