Over the years I've been inspired by books, people I've met, and those who were free spirited folks who came to Alaska with nothing to their names and lived, thrived, and successefully fed themselves with nothing. It's basically the tradition of the frontiersman, the free spirit of those that conquered the unknown of our state that is my inspiration. I want to put together a hunt using nothing but the ugliest bull***** gear you've ever seen......and I want this to be an AOD member driven accomplishemnt with me being the idiot test pilot.
I find life is boring when my fancy raingear keeps me dry, my gps tells me where on the river I'm at, and my scope shows a cystal-clear image of the moose im about to shoot along a fancy "x marks the spot of when to pull the trigger". I find it boring when my fancy moose call can be used as a funnel fill my truck with oil, mix drinks for my buddies, thrash brush, and sold online with a fancy video that shows me all the "set it and forget it" uses of this mavelous "as seen on tv" device......all for six easy payments of $9.35" I find it boring when my perfect running outboard motor never breaks down, and my square sterned canoe crests the waves perfectly with an entire moose on board. I find it boring when my pack makes 100 lbs. feel like 65 lbs. because of it's perfect construction. I find it boring when my rifle has most of it's blueing......even though it's fancy and new in appearance.
So this is what I need to make this joke a reality. I need to buy gear that is ugly, has holes in it, is old, and only costs 1 dollar........cuz nothing in this life is free. Here is a list for this junkyard moose hunt and if you think you can contribute than post NOW! You must include a photo of the item for sale and the ugliest one wins the dollar.....you must buy it back from me at the end of the season though for 50 cents.
I'm going to make a square sterned canoe out of birch bark, and I hope it takes on water.
I need a pair of hip wader boots with holes in size 10-11. If they smell bad, ill just soak em, if they have holes, ill patch them.....the ugliest pair gets my dollar.
I need the ugliest, oldest johnson or evinrude 9.9-15 horse outboard motor you have (i know they are out there i see them coming out of wasilla on craiglist all the time in "like new condition"). I don't care if your wife planted a **** flower garden around it cuz she thought it looks "old and pretty" I don't care if a family of red squirrels lives in cylinder # 1. I don't care if four foot grass grew up all around it, and I don't care if it doesnt run, I'll just by another for 1 dollar if I cant get it running.
I need your 20 yr. old fuel that you are scarred to run in your fancy new jet drive, i dont care if it's mixed, and I dont care what oil you use or how old it is.
I need old hunting clothing that is made out of wool. It has to be so old and ugly that the kid who played the banjo on the movie deliverence wouldnt even allow me on his property, the ugliest wool clothes that fits me gets my 1 dollar.
I need a surplus military rifle, or old lever action rifle of sufficient killing power. I don't care if all the bluing is gone and it's sat outside, i dont care if the stock is grey, i dont care if it shoots 4 inch groups at 50 yards......it just has to be the ugliest and I'll buy it for 1 dollar......of course AOD will get their "10%" of the sale price payed......and like a forum member should.....I'll make sure they get their money. Just please make sure it has open sights.
I got the coffee can covered And i think i got the bootlace covered too......it will be one ugly moose call.
This junkyard moose hunt has a two fold purpose.......to show my respect to those free spirited Alaskans who conquered the unknown and lived to tell about it.......and to scoff at those individuals (i wont list any names) who are so fancy they think they need a bare minimum of a Zeiss scope, and premium bullets to hunt moose (even more premium than a nosler Partition).
I WILL SPEND FULL PRICE ON A FEW BRAND NEW BLUE TARPS THOUGH......THERE AINT NO JOKING AROUND WHEN IT COMES TO VISQUEEN. Im not firing up my homemade woodstove unless I see "new blue" light shining through when I wake up in the morning.
I hope the outboard stutters and breaks down occasionally, I hope the boat takes on a little bit of water where I have to pull out my bilge pump......a milk jug with the top cut off.
I hope the rifle doesnt group too well.....but i do hope it doesnt jam.
I hope my free maps and my old compass rivals my GPS and my fancy tritium lensatic compass.
I hope I make it back alive......but if it takes two more weeks.....oh well
Life really is boring sometimes with all of our fancy gear.