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Thread: Boat type not equal to intelligence

  1. #1

    Default Boat type not equal to intelligence

    I returned to Whittier one weekend at low tide, the middle ramp had one high and dry on the concrete, owner probably by the waterfall looking for his truck, and the end ramp totally full as far as the eye could see. The line of people wanting to launch was as long as it gets. I was amazed to see a group of guys actually backing down the ramp with a "______"(brand not mentioned out of respect for the boat) on a tripple axel trailer! The end concrete slab was exposed, the drop off at the end was visible, what were they expecting? Obviously, the trailer hung off the last concrete slab and slammed down with great force, the boat not even close to being able to come off the trailer! They all bailed out of the truck and tried to power the boat off, then they all pushed on the boat, and nothing. How could this person own this type of boat and have so little common sense? I seem to encounter some type of fool every year that truly doesn't know what the heck they are doing. I bet this forum could write a book on foolish antics they have encountered that don't really count as true disasters, but just dump stuff that people do around boats. (Insert your story here)

  2. #2

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    I had a BIL from a landlocked state who was the worst lubber I ever saw.

    Bought a $30k bass boat with a top-of-the-line trolling motor, never used the TM. Would pull into a shallow cove (down South), and toss out an anchor. When he covered all the water he could from that spot, he'd fire up his 175 Johnson and idle over 50 yards or so.
    About 1/2 the time he'd forget to pull the anchor when he left the hole for a long run.... "This dang boat ain't runnin' right! Won't plane out!" ...
    Went through anchors, props, cleats, and batteries pretty quick.

    I remember starting to tell him he could get a GPS and mark his route in to the honey hole so he'd have a safe way out in the dark and could stay out in the marsh after dark.
    The whole time I was saying this, my sister and his mother are behind him making "No" faces, shaking their heads, and waving their arms...

    Seems they didn't exactly trust him either..."Let''s not talk about going way out or staying out late around your BIL. The Coast Guard has enough to do..."



  3. #3

    Default No boating class would help. Video Cam Needed!

    Living Homewr a few years ago I found tons of entertainment at the boat launch.
    Watched a familey show up with a new type motor home and a huge boat. After a long time at the top of the ramp the guy had his wife back it down to the water. Well she was not doing a very good job keeping it straight. After about 10 trys backing down and going forward and backing down again she was 8 feet from the waters edge. All this time he's standing back there screaming orders, STOP, GO FORWARD, BACK UP, TURN RIGHT, TURN LEFT. Well she trys to back the last few feet and sure enough gets it sideways again. This time he screams GO FORWARD YOU STUPID B*#%&@ !!! Well buy now she's pissed, he red in the face mad. So she slams the shift into drive and stomps on the gas. Motor home & trailer went forward, winch line snaps & the boat launched right there 2 foot from the water, lands right on the outboard lower unit that he had all the way down, and breaks a big chunck off.
    Guess I should of said, "Now that will spoil a fishing trip"
    And I thought weekends where for relaxing.

  4. #4
    Member propgrinder's Avatar
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    Default

    Had one here in Fairbanks at Pike's Landing launch. Everybody was launching their boats on about the first nice day of the year. When I pulled up with my jon boat/Go-devil, there was a very pretty and huge inboard jet boat (BFJB) backed down the ramp and part-way into the water The owner (and friend) were attempting to get the engine started, and blocking the ramp for anyone else to use for quite a while. Lots of swearing going on, tools being thrown about, friend getting his anal pore enlarged, etc. Then, the boat was pulled up off the ramp into the parking lot. I pulled up along side the BFJB and asked the owner if he was done with the ramp. His neck veins were throbbing, his face was red, he had on a T-shirt with no sleeves, tattoos on all arms, teeth clamped together, and the engine cover off, staring into the engine. Both he and his friend glared at me like I'd pooped on their picnic. The BFJB owner said "Go @#$%^ ahead and use the @#$$%^ ramp, a...hole!" So, I calmly launched my little jon boat/Go-devil. As I was parking my truck, the BFJB owner peeled out of the parking lot in a cloud of dust and sprayed gravel.

    My only regret is not offering him jumper cables and having my bear spray handy if he lunged for me!

  5. #5

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    The boat ramp is certainly entertaining....people at the boat ramp are even more entertaining.

  6. #6

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    There's quite a learning curve for some people. Everybody has to learn sometime, and you just hope that it's quick and not too expensive. One time in Seward, a guy was having his wife back up the trailer so he could retrieve his boat. She was having a hard time and he was giving her lots of grief about it. After he finally got the boat hooked up, he told her to get out of the way and he'd pull the boat out. Well, he stomped on the gas and as he pulled up the ramp his outdrive (that he forgot to raise) dragged on the concrete ramp. I thought he got what he deserved, but he probably ended up somehow blaming his wife for it.

    I have more patience for people who are having problems like getting their boat on the trailer because we've probably all been there. The people who get me are the ones who don't get their boat ready (loading fishing gear, food, etc.) until they are at the top of the ramp and blocking everyone else. Then there was the time when some joker had his boat tied off at the front of the dock so that no one else could launch or retrieve. After a long time waiting, here he comes walking down to his boat with coffee and muffins that he'd stopped to buy on his way. If you're holding up people because you're new at boating and are at least trying to hurry, that's one thing. But when you're holding up people simply because you're inconsiderate, then that's something all together different. Oh, and I would gladly put up with all of these people if Spring would get here soon so I could fish soon

  7. #7

    Default MY bad...

    Well, so far we've got stories of others' screwups, here's one of my own:
    First time taking our Almar out of Deep Creek; (I did have all the gear on the boat ready to go BTW); got the whole rig ready and got hooked up with the tractor but forgot one thing; the straps that I had holding the transom of the boat to the trailer for trailering; OOPS! Need I mention to you guys about how many people are around at Deep Creek when launching boats??? Well, those tractor guys reverse us at about Mach 3 into the chop with water cascading over the transom, the guy hits the brakes to slide us off the trailer; BAM! We about fall on our backs onto the deck and the noise sounded like we ripped the transom off the boat (I loosened up those transom straps quite a bit but got sidetracked and forgot to un-hook them).
    No damage done, and I made as quick a getaway out into the inlet fast as possible!
    Jim

  8. #8

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    The funniest one I saw was a guy being a complete ahole while backing down the ramp. I don't get in a hurry when I'm going fishing, I'm there to relax. This guy unhooks his boat before he even gets down the ramp. Boat goes sliding off. Looks to be a near new 26 foot aluminum boat. Slid about 15 feet down the ramp. People get what they have coming to them.

  9. #9
    Member AK NIMROD's Avatar
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    a friend did high speed launch at Kenai ramp when his started to slide off trailer.. he made it to water but i guess there was one heck of a splash. wish i had been there to see and video it
    RETIRED U.S.A.F. CAPT.; LIFETIME MEMBER NRA; LIFETIME MEMBER ALASKA BOWHUNTER ASSOC.
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  10. #10
    Member fishin 45's Avatar
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    Last year at one of those really low tide mornings I wandered down the ramp in Whittier. I said hi to a guy standing there looking over at a boat sitting on the launch about 10 feet from the water. He asked when I thought the tide would come back. After a short conversation, I had a story to tell my clients for the day.

    This gentleman bought his new (yes new) fiberglass cabin cruiser the day before. He excitedly talked his wife and son into going to Whittier to try her out. They got there through the last tunnel the night before and instantly launched his new rig. After they went out of the harbor the wife said "Take me back in. I'm not going with you in a new boat in the dark." He told me he reluctantly turned around and tied up to the ramp. He decided they would leave at first light and no one would need the ramp until then. So he climbed into his new bunk to try it out.
    As he stood there with me he asked, "Do you think I may have hurt it?" I just told him I let my boat go dry often and then went and climbed in my Aluminum boat and eased away.

  11. #11
    Sponsor potbuilder's Avatar
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by fishin 45 View Post
    Last year at one of those really low tide mornings I wandered down the ramp in Whittier. I said hi to a guy standing there looking over at a boat sitting on the launch about 10 feet from the water. He asked when I thought the tide would come back. After a short conversation, I had a story to tell my clients for the day.

    This gentleman bought his new (yes new) fiberglass cabin cruiser the day before. He excitedly talked his wife and son into going to Whittier to try her out. They got there through the last tunnel the night before and instantly launched his new rig. After they went out of the harbor the wife said "Take me back in. I'm not going with you in a new boat in the dark." He told me he reluctantly turned around and tied up to the ramp. He decided they would leave at first light and no one would need the ramp until then. So he climbed into his new bunk to try it out.
    As he stood there with me he asked, "Do you think I may have hurt it?" I just told him I let my boat go dry often and then went and climbed in my Aluminum boat and eased away.
    Hey i remember that guy also he asked me when the tide would be in and if i thought he had done any damage to his drive (it didn't look to good sitting on the ramp).

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  12. #12
    Member akrstabout's Avatar
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    Default seen that guy also

    I couldn't believe it. Seems like a lot of us hit whittier and must not know eash others boat names. It is unreal what I see there. I try and be nice. Twice I left the rig, someone else always driving, and started directing people to where to go and keep those a holes from cutting line. I had a few people ask ?'s and if I worked for the city. I am capt'n of slaughterhouse, red aluminum boat with a gray top. On the dock or ramp is no place for mistakes. I missed a good one by a few hours on season. Some huge fiberglass boat decided to switch sides on the big ramp because of concrete and exposed rebar. It was said he didn't secure boat back to trailer and dumped it on the ramp. City employee said it was quite hectick that afternoon, sunday I believe. I like the middle ramp. As long as she is barely wet I can drop in there.

  13. #13
    Member Cliffhanger's Avatar
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    Default Immaculate Retrieve

    The absolute coolest RETRIEVE of a boat at the ramp that I have ever seen was in Homer about 5 years ago.

    I was tied up to the dock ready to go get my truck when I saw a young guy in a big open skiff motoring from the ocean side up to the ramp at a pretty good clip. He was not throwing a wake but he didn't slow down when he turned the corner at the end of the float and headed for the cement ramp. I looked up at the top of the ramp and there's a pickup with an empty trailer backing over the rise. The guy in the boat, and the guy driving the truck just came on a'comin'.

    They didn't use the float. They picked the open middle between the floats to meet. As the trailer splashed into the water, the guy driving the boat gunned it and shot up onto the trailer. The truck stopped for a split second, then reversed, and as the dripping boat came out of the water, the guy in the boat raised the engine and rode that boat up the ramp.

    I think they must have been brothers. I just sat there in my boat with my mouth open as they disappeared over the rise. The whole thing took abut 45 seconds from start to finish...

  14. #14

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    Quote Originally Posted by AKBroncoII View Post
    The funniest one I saw was a guy being a complete ahole while backing down the ramp. I don't get in a hurry when I'm going fishing, I'm there to relax. This guy unhooks his boat before he even gets down the ramp. Boat goes sliding off. Looks to be a near new 26 foot aluminum boat. Slid about 15 feet down the ramp. People get what they have coming to them.
    That same thing happened at Deer Lake to a man on the launch next to me. I saw him unhook and really thought nothing of it and figured he had a bunk trailer as the launch is not that steep. Well, it was an easyloader roller. It did make it to the water, but crashed a little on the concrete. The kicker went in the drink. My wife and I went out and helped him find the kicker. Through casual conversation and trying not to die laughing, we found out he was taking the boat out on a test drive and it wasn't even his. He commented, well I guess I own it now....It still just kills me. The worst part, the lake trout were totally off the bite.

  15. #15
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    While coming back from our cabin last Sept. at Lake Louise on a quiet tuesday evening, there was an airboat trying to load up just as we arrived at the launch. They backed up thier pickup truck with a flat trailer down to the water, and instead of simply hooking on the the bow-loop and cranking it up with the winch, the airboat operator insisted on driving it up onto the trailer. They were having a bit of difficulty, and we patiently waited offshore watching the whole thing. They both got out, scratched thier heads a little, and then retried inching the Airboat up, and kept getting it stuck at the same spot on the trailer over and over.

    Finally Impatience set in, and as he got it to the same spot on the trailer they kept getting it stuck at, he gave it some more throttle, as in ALOT of throttle, and drove the airboat over the trailer hitch, and broke the rear window of the camper shell as he drove the bow of the airboat into the back of the pickup. At that point we were extremely amused, they were extremely embarrased , and they pulled up and out of the way with the whole thing still stuck in the back of the guys truck.

    They wouldn't even look at me as I walked by to get my truck and trailer and load up our boat. After we loaded up and pulled up the ramp, the old guy ( Airboat driver ) glanced over and gave me look I'll never forget.
    Before I could park things and walk over to offer assistance, they zoomed off, with the Airboat back on the trailer as it should be.

    They left so fast I never did get to see what happenned to the bottom of that boat and the front winch & bow-rest arm...

  16. #16
    Member JOAT's Avatar
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    Default Pit-stop launching!

    Quote Originally Posted by Cliffhanger View Post
    The absolute coolest RETRIEVE of a boat at the ramp that I have ever seen was in Homer about 5 years ago.

    I was tied up to the dock ready to go get my truck when I saw a young guy in a big open skiff motoring from the ocean side up to the ramp at a pretty good clip. He was not throwing a wake but he didn't slow down when he turned the corner at the end of the float and headed for the cement ramp. I looked up at the top of the ramp and there's a pickup with an empty trailer backing over the rise. The guy in the boat, and the guy driving the truck just came on a'comin'.

    They didn't use the float. They picked the open middle between the floats to meet. As the trailer splashed into the water, the guy driving the boat gunned it and shot up onto the trailer. The truck stopped for a split second, then reversed, and as the dripping boat came out of the water, the guy in the boat raised the engine and rode that boat up the ramp.

    I think they must have been brothers. I just sat there in my boat with my mouth open as they disappeared over the rise. The whole thing took abut 45 seconds from start to finish...
    My dad and I do just about the same thing when we are out together. When we get to the launch, I'll dump him off to go get the truck and I'll pull out and hold. When he backs down the ramp, I'm lining up the the trailer and as soon as it has water over it, I'm powering up onto the trailer. I'll hold the boat against the trailer with the motor while he starts to pull forward slowly. As soon as the weight is on the bunks, I'll cut the motor and start tilting it up while he pulls up off the ramp and into the parking lot to finish securing it. It works great and is very fast. With full length carpet bunks with side rails, the boat can't slide off either. We're just as fast launching it. I hate waiting at the ramp and make every effort to launch and retrieve as fast as possible. I'm never the hold up.
    Winter is Coming...

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  17. #17
    Member propgrinder's Avatar
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    Yep, I'm not immune from entertaining the ramp crowd. Why, once a long time ago, I thought I was such a boatman that I could drive my boat up on the trailer. I boggled the approach and fell down in the boat, lost the tiller handle, and ended up almost sideways on the trailer. Many spectators, much redness in the face.

    One thing I haven't done, so far that is, is lose the boat on a tight corner and drive her up on the shore.

    It's coming, I'm sure......

  18. #18

    Thumbs up Funny stuff

    This is some funny stuff, classic in fact.

  19. #19
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    Smile Sideways on the trailer indeed.

    For me one of the most terrifying things about boating early on was getting the boat on the trailer. Quite a few years ago I bought my first riverboat, a 16' Hewes RiverRunner. It came with a trailer that had no side boards or rollers, just the bottom boards. I took it out to a lake to practice trailering it and thought, "gee that isn't so difficult." One sunny June day my son and I launched at Pike's Landing on the Chena River, no problems there. On the return I dropped the son off and he backed the trailer into the water. Oh my gosh, all I can see of the trailer is the winch and the tongue. And then there's this **** current forcing me down stream. Oh well, I've watched lots of people do this, gave it some gas and did a perfect job of parking the boat across the trailer. The worst part of it all was that it was about 4 p.m. on Friday afternoon, there were just a lot of bar patrons out on the deck watching. Never have I had so many people raise their glasses to me.

  20. #20
    Member willster33's Avatar
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    Default The Boat Launch

    Well here goes, my first time launching down in Homer at the deep water boat launch is one to remember. I bought a used 24’ aluminum jet boat with a 454 in her and did a little fix up to get her running good because gosh knows you need all the power you can get when chasing fish around. So after two weeks of working on her and taking her out on the lake to see if she was running the way I thought she should I decided it was time to do a little fishing. Down to Homer we went the wife the three kids and our new boat ready to catch the big one. Now Homer can be a busy place in the summer but not nearly as busy as Memorial weekend with the thousands of people from all around trying to do the same thing, as in launch a boat. But never fear I brought a friend with experience to help guide me through this mess and get me started on the right foot. After some instruction on not blocking the launch for a long time and getting everything ready well in advance we get in line and wait our turn. Making sure the boat was still attached to the trailer with the wench and safety chain we backed down the ramp and get her in the water. A perfect performance that even the most seasoned sailor could appreciate. Now with the boating experience getting under way all we needed to do was turn her around and put put out of the harbor, so my friend went to his boat and left his friend there to assist me as needed, so he asks me if I can back her out ok and well I says sure did it at the lake fine and this should be no different. Well then start her up and we will get going, so with my limited experience I fired her up and he pushed us off and well because it’s a jet boat and the bucket is up we move forward much faster then I thought we would or wanted to, so in one quick movement I lunge for the reversing bucket to slow her down a bit only to my dismay I snag the throttle with the cuff of my favorite warm shirt that I like to wear when things look cold outside and with all her power unleashed we start approaching mach 1.1 right in the direction I did not want to go so with everything in me I turn the boat hard to port and preformed a perfect doughnut in the middle of the deep water launch at the Homer harbor and hit the kill switch and drifted in circles till we stopped . Now I will never know why or really how we missed all the other boats at the put in but as luck or rather GOD would have it the only thing hurt that day was my pride as I could hear people on the docks who thought I did it in purpose saying look at that kid in daddy’s boat showing off. My wife all the while telling me that this is a NO WAKE zone. So we finely did put out of the harbor but only after I parked in an open slip a while and tied fishing knots with the kids so my heart could regain some normal rhythm. My wife still hates the harbor and tells me she is ok once we are out in open water with nothing to hit.

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